That was quick

Blah blah blabbity blah. I don't even know where to start. So Steve and I have decided to go to Dinseyland for his vacation, my old boss got fired and can't stand up for me to have full time, I actually don't mind part-time, Steve quit the radio station, my roommate is getting more pregnant and more stupid, Amanda is getting more pregnant and more stupid. I found out I'm infertile and probably with never have children and Dan's moving in January and we need to find a new house.
Shall I elaborate on any of these?
How about Disneyland. Let's start with a good note. Steve has vacation days now and we were going to go to the Zombie Walk. When Steve spoke to our assistant manager, he told her that he's taking me to meet his mother and wants to know if I can get the days off too. She said it shouldn't be a problem. A week later, we checked the days off and I didn't get them, but Steve did. So, Steve went back in to talk to our assistant manager and she said that I haven't even been there for a year to earn time off. She said I hadn't even been there for 90 days. I've been there for 5 months. It will be 6 in a week. I realize that's still not a year, but it's definitely more than 90 days. So there was no reason I should get time off. But the original plan was to go up to Oregon, grab Kelsey and Kylie, go to the Zombie Walk, head down the 101 to Disneyland, visit Steve's mom in Vegas on the way home, and head back to Elko and have Dad come pick up Kelsey and Kylie from me and have them hang out with him over the Summer. But now our days have been cut much shorter. Since I'm no longer on a full-time schedule, I have three days off. Enough to go to Vegas, hang out with Steve's mom, drive to Disneyland for the day, and then drive back to Vegas. So this is all happening July 3rd, 4th, and 5th. I'm hoping we can get our free tickets into Disneyland, if not... well that's okay. I have the cash to pay for it if not. The woman that hired me on as Backroom Inventory recently got fired, so I've been told, and she was trying to get me full-time and the manager she was working with to make this happen, put her two weeks in. Her last day was last Saturday. So now I have no one who's trying to get me full-time, but I'm starting to realize, it's not that bad. I'm making decent money and with Steve's help, if I don't have that extra 8 hours, it's not going to kill me. Steve and I also got a joint bank account. So I can control the finances. The only problem is, Steve can too. Haha, he's actually really good with money, but he's also an impulse shopper. We'll discover more, I suppose.
Also, recently, Steve quit the radio station. Honestly, the only reason he had a second job was because he had nothing better to do with his time and Steve's a workaholic. He can afford to not have the second job. The reason he quit was he was only supposed to be working from 8-12, but the hours kept running later and Steve kept getting home later only getting minimal hours of sleep. And his new sales representative boss was putting all of his work on him and not doing a lot of it on his own. Steve only found this out recently when he had work with his ex co-worker.
Brandy quit her job and she does nothing but sleep or mope around the house. I'm cleaning dishes constantly and cleaning the counters. I'm so fed up with doing it so much. I mean, I understand things can't stay clean forever, but geez. The amount of time to get this place dirtier than what I just cleaned it from takes what could be measured as nano seconds. Brandy's trying to get on medicade, but she doesn't have any of her information, she doesn't recall when she was last in work, blah blah blah. Sometimes i just want to look at people and say, "Grow the fuck up." but I'm pretty positive this is something Brandy will never be able to do. Even with being a mother.
Amanda, the girl who is possibly pregnant with Steve's child... they found out that it's going to be a boy. Steve's really upset about it. He always wanted to name his first son after him, but he doesn't want to name his son after him with a woman he hates. She keeps bringing up retarded names like Lamko and such. Steve's not going for it at all. They were texting and he said absolutely not to Lamko. Then she said, "It's my baby, I'll name it what I want." Then Steve replied, "Fine, then I have no fiscal responsibility for it and don't need anything to do with it." Then she started back pedaling realizing the shit she put herself in and Steve finally said, "How about we find something you, I, and Robert (the possible other father) agree on." She flipped out. "Robert has no part in this." Steve responded, "What if he's the father." Amanda says, "I don't care. He's not part of my life anymore."
So that fucking means that Steve's still part of her life. She wants Steve to be part of her life. I don't want to share him at all. If this is his kid, I'm going to have to share him for the rest of my life. It's very upsetting.
We went to a follow up appointment with the doctor about my extreme pain. He said he didn't really know what the pain was, but I do have PCOS. Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. I'm prone to developing cysts on my ovaries and this causes extreme difficulty to get pregnant. It's not impossible, but it's highly improbable. The other day, Steve's cousin, Adrian, his wife just had a baby. We were there a couple hours after she was born and Steve handed her to me and I got to hold her. Later that day, Steve asks if he gave me baby fever by letting me hold the baby.
The funny thing is, I've had baby fever. Before I knew Amanda, I kind of wanted a child. I was in the wrong situation for one though. 1) I didn't have a boyfriend or dependable man to be the father (in which I would want if I ever got pregnant). 2) I was going to college. 3) I was running track. 4) I didn't have a dependable job. 5) I didn't have a stable home. There were a thousand other reasons I couldn't have one on top of those, those were just the big ones. But when Amanda found out she was pregnant, I was there every step of the way during her pregnancy. I held her legs as little Aerowyn was born because Amanda was too short to reach the stirrups and be comfortable at the same time. The moment Aerowyn was born, I wanted one more than ever. I was dating Dustin at the time, but there's no way we could of had a kid together. I'd have to wait for him to grow up much more. Seeing kids running around Walmart didn't help. Lots of them were cute. You would think it would scare me off of children, but it didn't. Then I got with Steve and discovering that he might be the father to someone else's child amplified my jealousy of having children. Then Brandy finds out she's pregnant and she's probably the last person that needs to be a mother. Then I visit the doctor's and they're like, "You can't have kids." I pretty much just felt like... Challenge Accepted.
I mean, I'm not in the best situation to raise children right now. I don't have my own home, I'm only 19, I need to go back to school, I would like to be 21 and party a couple times before I have to call a babysitter for me to do so... but it just sucks that when you realize you want to be something... be a mom... and everyone in the world tells you you can't and waves what they can do in front of your face. I hate Amanda in the first place and the fact that she's pregnant with MY boyfriend's child and wants him back... how am I supposed to feel? How am I supposed to react?
Then we discover that Dan is moving in January. So we need a new place before then. Elko's not cheap. Steve and I have been househunting, but all the houses that are in our price range are just really shitty. I don't know what we're supposed to do.
So... see how my life can change in a matter of a single week?